Aho!! :)

The Guru and the Ganga

2011-06-13T21:29:00.004+05:30

I stand there, looking at the Guru, mesmerized by the dispassion on his face, as he performs the last rites of his departed father, unmoved, unshaken.

I look at the Guru, the stillness in every action, I look at the Ganga flowing right over his shoulder, the tranquility in it’s flow...

The flowing water stirs up a stillness in me. As I look at it, I realize how time is ever-flowing, how it’s passing away right now, as I’m simply standing here.

The Ganga, the Sky, smoothly dissolve into each other. The same color, the similar openness, embracing everything, everyone present there.

The Guru, the playful wisdom, the same openness, embracing everything, everyone present there…

The steps that lead me to the holy waters are slippery. Will the slippery steps hold me long enough to pull me away from the world, I wonder..

A part of me has stayed back, a part of me will immerse into it when I go...

2011-06-07T10:40:00.001+05:30

Okay.

:)

2011-05-08T20:27:00.001+05:30

What's your greatest strength?

"I Love People. I just love them. "

Ownership

2011-05-03T22:16:00.002+05:30

Stop having important things in life.

Start owning them and you'll see none is left out.

:)

2011-04-24T22:19:00.001+05:30

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqMWS-wbuss

2011-03-25T15:11:00.002+05:30

drive really slow
I’ll sprinkle my thoughts
here and there
they're getting too much for me to keep

slowly turn the wheel around
we’ll quietly look around for familiar sounds

slow down
these speeding lights
hold them still for me
please, will you

these people walking around
make them stop
what if I wanted to draw them

let me stay here and just be
lemme just sit here till it goes, till it's over
this feeling it's lingered on wee bit too long
I'm sure it'll go

in the meanwhile

save the chill in the wind till I come
there’s no winter where I stay, you know

Pause the raindrops till I’m back
we'll jump over puddles
and fall in some

please make sure they remain by the roadside,
these fallen leaves of autumnal-spring-time trees
I’ll come back and we'll walk through them one day
shades of brown and yellow, maroon and autumn

and also the fresh green ones
the fluorescent greens and the parrot greens
fluttering in the cool breeze
looking up up and away
wondering why those mountains never sway

Remember all the gossip
memorize the important news
I’ll hear it patiently
Each days episode and
more importantly each of your views

save your arbitrary bad moods
I’ll pamper you when I'm back
save your arbitrary good moods
you can pamper me when I'm back

and the little breaks you get during the day
save them for me
excuse yourself from friends and walks and naps
Let me be a little possessive when I’m there.

I'll bring new flowers
but do keep the old
When I'm away,
as I'm told,
you talk to them
sometimes even scold
that the newest flower I gave you
is now quite old

Try getting the tune ;)

2011-03-21T01:21:00.004+05:30

I don't need no tune
It's neither May nor June
It's my Sunday Monday! :)

Take off the window pane
In my toy aero plane
Wave to the people in the lane
Coz it's my SUnday MonDay :)

Ride my bike or hitchhike
Fly my orange kite
Go grab a li’l bite
It’s my SUnday MonDay :)

As I walk by the lake
Fewnew words I 'ill make
Coz it’s a Sunday Monday!

It’s a funny sort of day
In a happy sort of way
It’s my Sunday Monday! :)

2011-03-18T22:22:00.003+05:30

Intelligent men are only too intelligent to deny the existence of the supernatural. Ask seasoned sailors and you’ll agree there’s more than just lightening that links the stormy oceans with the high thunderous clouds.

It takes a crazy appetite for madness to play with magic. He knows it’s been floating around for quite some time now. It will come closer, the moment he decides to reach out for it.

He walks confidently in the turquoise seawaters, his half pants now fully immersed in ’em. Dwelling in the joy of the achievement that awaits him today, he flashes a broad sailor smile as he lifts the bottle-green bottle floating knowingly towards him. He knows only too well how far, how long it’s floated to reach him, Today. Firmly holding it in the left hand, he splashes some water on his face with the right. A strong wind rushes past him as he takes long strides back towards the shore, enjoying the touch of the fine sand in the pebbles under his feet.

Sheer stupidity leads his crew to dub him a stoic sailor. Ask the sea and the sky and you’ll know the love he harbors for every harbor. He draws out the old, pale piece of parchment from the bottle. Before he unrolls it, he bends down and pours fistfuls of sand into the bottle with childish elation. It’ll find its place in the chest of bottles (not the rum ones) that appear similar on the outside but starkly differ in their contents- Sands of every harbor, all valued and preserved and carried along during his sails.

He unrolls the ‘parchment’ with an innocent reverence. He knows it holds his future, and something more than the future; nothing less than infinity itself. Etched in plain cursive, handwriting he instantaneously recognizes-

Today
----------------------------------------------------------

2011-03-10T02:07:00.001+05:30

It's brilliant how focussed we are when we're angry.

birdy fly fly :)

2011-03-07T23:04:00.001+05:30

I used to write.
Now I sing.
I used to sing.
Now I dance
I used to dance.
Now I fly...

2011-01-29T22:53:00.000+05:30

.

...

Old Year’s Night!

2011-01-01T01:05:00.004+05:30

Old Year’s Night
Ye’ gone year’s delight
It’s time you became the New Year’s Eve
Of course we could sit here by the fireplace
And listen to your stories all night
But it’ll soon be day
And you’ll have to be gone away...

Ye' Old Year’s Night
We’ll look back and remember you
Talk about your secret charm
of holding us back,
of holding us close
But the Morning awaits us
The New Year’s here especially to take us

Ye Old Year’s Night
You're too old to fall for promises
Yet I’ll tell you why I’ll keep you
I’ll need the Wisdom of your experiences
I'll envy the Mischief you wrapped yourself in
I’ll crave for your Insanity
(I know you still have loads of it)
I’ll relive the Happiest moments of my life
When I think of you

Ye' Old Year’s Night
Let me go now, would you?
Knowing,
You’ve been the best year of my life
Indeed a wondersome delight!

Finally.....before the year ended:-

2010-12-30T19:34:00.000+05:30

The Answer :) :) :)

2010-12-28T23:27:00.001+05:30

another life.

2010-12-14T22:09:00.003+05:30

There's just one place to go-

EVERYWHERE :)

;)

2010-12-08T22:42:00.003+05:30

You don't need to be a little crazy to do what we just did. You need to be totally-completely-consistently insane!

:)

2010-11-05T23:40:00.002+05:30

there's no greater imprudence than excessive prudence

:)

2010-10-19T23:59:00.004+05:30

Soon...

2010-10-09T01:00:00.000+05:30

Please Rain.

2010-10-02T11:50:00.003+05:30

More the time I spend with children, more strongly is my belief reinstated that We were born to do something truly-purely-wonderful.

We were not, in fact, could not have been born for doing anything lesser.

Work hard, work really hard everyday but be sure you know what you're working hard for.

2010-09-19T22:42:00.003+05:30

We define what is practical and what’s not based on the radius of our comfort zones.

Bangalore Part 1

2010-09-07T22:50:00.003+05:30

December 26, 2009

It’s been a long anxious journey from the airport. The centre is 21 km on a certain Kanakpura road. Kanakpura road is around one and a half hour from the airport. It’s a long wide deserted highway, wider than any highway I’ve seen before. The dark open sky has never been more open. For miles and miles on my left and right I can see, nothing. A green board appears in front of me.
Hyderabad xyz km Chennai abc km Mumbai pqr km.
Cool.

The driver turns on the radio. The kannad songs freak me out. How do I know they’re kannad? They could be tamil, who knows. I worry why the car has black windows. I wonder how long it’ll take. I worry whether I’ll reach on time or not. I worry whether I’ll reach there or not. Mom’s calling for the tenth time. She asks how many people are there in the car. “Three,” I lie.

I’m scared. It’s an empty highway. I try thinking about the centre and the reason for which I’m there. I get a call but I cut it soon to make sure I save battery. But after five minutes I call back. I need to talk to someone. It’s reassuring.
We enter the city. It’s just too crowded. Narrow lanes, too many flashing lights, foreign dialects, unfamiliar faces. I get the feeling we’re circling the same place time and again. Once we’re out of the jam I’m able to see the sides of the road. There’s a wall running parallel to almost the entire length of the road. It’s painted with scenes from god knows which epic. It’s got palaces and courtyards, unknown gods and goddesses, angels and demons- culture reflected in bright colors, annoying usage of yellows and golden and black and navy blues and maroons. Just when I start appreciating the art, the driver turns back and says he doesn’t exactly know where Kanakpura road is.

Hmm, for how long has he known where he’s supposed to drop me? How dare he not know where kanakpura road is! He was supposed to find that out before picking me from the airport! And for god sake how can a local guy not know where it is! Am I supposed to roll down the window and ask people where it is? Hang on, will they even understand Hindi? None of the people I know who’ve already reached the centre are taking my calls. I declare myself mad to have thought of travelling alone 21000km away from home, at this hour, in an unknown land of unknown people. What have I gotten myself into. I must’ve been seriously deranged when I decided to travel alone. High time I stopped taking spontaneous last minute decisions and started using some wisdom. Never again will I do something this stupid. The virgo in me starts brutally criticizing me. I close my eyes. I have made a picture of the centre in my mind. I wish to see it when I open my eyes.

He parks the car near a what we would think is an ice cream vendors’ cart but it’s actually some south- Indian-dish-vendors cart. I’m sure the thing written on the glass of the cart tells what dish it is but again it’s written in kannad or malyalam or tamil or whichever language I can’t understand. He gets off and walks to a group of funnily dressed middle aged men. They point forward and give him directions in their language. I try to catch something out of it, in vain. I feel slightly reassured and secure now. Suddenly I’m sure I’ll reach safely. Of course I’ll reach safely.

We’re now on a narrow deserted road with what looks like jungles on both sides. A few speeding cars pass by. We keep driving for what seems like an hour. For the fifth I ask him how long it’ll take. “Fifteen minutes,” he says for the fifth time. My stomach is rumbling with what is more like anxiety than hunger.

Mom’s been calling. I’ve not been taking the calls cause I don’t want to get shouted at. I send a message that I’ll reach in ten. And I send that message ten times. I finally take her call. And just then around the corner I see what is the most relieving sight. The security guard checks my name on a list. I’m expecting to see VM but all I see are jungles on both sides of the road. I can’t stop smiling. And finally the guy stops the car. I see people laughing and walking around. I step out of the car and start rolling my huge bag towards what looks like the reception. My feet hurt. (I make a mental note never to wear boots again while travelling)

As I look up I see a board that says- Welcome Home.

I don’t feel stupid anymore.

:’)

I go and get my id card. the receptionist tells me he'll be needing a passport size picture. i'm not carrying any. no problems, look here, we'll take a picture right now. and then he looks up from behind the desk, worried. why aren't you smiling?!! lol and then i flash the most natural broadest smile i never thought i would be smiling like half an hour back. i take my id card, a map of the centre, my luggage and walk out of the reception. I've never believed in love at first sight.I keep walking without realizing what's on my right, till i look to my right side.
VM.
It's love at first sight :)

2010-08-24T23:04:00.003+05:30

it's incredible, the number of times you can ask yourself the same question.

and it's even more incredible, the number of times you get the same answer.

and there's no thin line between sanity and insanity. there's a zone, a zone in which sanity and insanity come so close that they necessarily mean One and the Same Thing.

and sometimes we can be arrogantly and adamantly blind.

and last year, rakhi was different

2010-08-08T23:18:00.002+05:30

Growing up consists of many individual, (appearing to be) unrelated Grew-up-in-a-day days.

:')

2010-08-01T20:30:00.002+05:30

kabhi kabhi, sab kuch mil jata hai...

2010-07-26T01:03:00.005+05:30

sometimes, i behave like the kid who wants a remote control car RIGHT NOW. aeroplane won't do. balloons i'll prick. candies i'll keep but retain the annoyed-annoying expression. Don't even think of tickling me. You might just get slapped. I'm serious. arms crossed, head slightly tilted downwards, looking in the direction opposite to where you are, i'll be the best 'mad-at-the world-girl' there can ever be. I am (eternally) Right and you are So Completely Wrong (by default). Any and Every effort to make me smile, i'll make it in vain. what i achieve from these kiddish means of self importance-nothing really. it's an essentially stupid behavior.

writing this makes me smile. Phew! Thank God! or i would've killed someone ;)

the funniest part is I accuse the person who is trying to cheer me up for not trying sufficiently hard or not really caring!

haye allah! girls n their antics! thank god i'm not a guy :D

P.S.- barbie would've been more appropriate than remote control car but really, out of those i know, girls who played with cars still outnumber those who played with barbies.

Today's lesson

2010-07-24T21:28:00.006+05:30

A thing of beauty is Not a joy forever.
It depends on who gives it to you.
John Keats uncle was wrong.
It's all relative.
If two different people give u the same gift, u will give em different places in your house.
In some cases, one of em might not find any place in the house.

I knew that value of anything can increase when a certain person gives it. I never thought the value of the same present can be nullified when someone else gives it, even if with the same regard.
Silly me.

2010-07-19T15:55:00.002+05:30

If only we realized what cowards it makes of us, choosing the easy over the right.

2010-07-13T19:29:00.004+05:30

In the diffused blue light of the morning sky, when the birds are still asleep in their nests and the whole world is at rest, a petite figure stands near the damp, unplastered boundary wall of a roof, her elbows resting gently on the wall still wet from the night’s rain.

There is pure silence. Pure cause it’s free from the attributes of awkwardness, comfort, discomfort. Pure silence- the mark of a mind at rest. Rest- the source of creativity. And we think it is chaos. We don’t see the underlying perfection in it. Perfection doesn’t flaunt. It gets covered under layers of imperfection, lying in subtleties we don’t have time for.

There’s a calmness in this moment. Free from the feverishness, the sense of urgency to ‘do’ something which is inherant at every other time of the day. Aware of the intrinsic flaw that lies in believing we’re in control.

It is still. Perfectly still. The kind of stillness one links with space. Not a leaf flutters. No sign of the faintest breeze. Yet there is something dynamic about this stillness. A rising energy, a rolling light, that energizes everything it falls on, if we only take our attention towards it.

As it turns slightly sky blue and black, silhouettes of trees in the forest secretly reveal themselves, to those who wake up to see them. Much like the ‘invisible’ mysterious things, our universe is full of, that patiently wait to be explored, often laughing at us as we unfailingly fail to see them.

‘Yesterday’ she was advised to stay away from this forest. ‘Yesterday’, which like a dream has passed and from which nothing more can be derieved, just as in a dream.

And there is Today. Today, with its infinite possibilities in each second. Today, offering to us, nothing less than infinity itself.

You need to empty your hands to receive what is being offered, or it might just slip off.

She gradually opens her eyes now that she has enough space to accept what it offers.

The meditation has just begun.

2010-07-11T16:52:00.002+05:30

Where is this place?

It doesn't have a name. We don't believe in names.

Names have a way of making things disappear.

I don't understand.

Things die a little when we name them.

When you name something it loses its existence to you.

Things are what they are. That is their power.

They are all the things we think they are, all the things we sense they are, and more.

They are themselves.

If they meant something they would be less.

Whatever you see is your personal wealth and paradise. You're lucky if you can see wonderful things. Some people who have been here see only infernal things. What you see is what you are, or what you will become.

I don't understand anything at all.

Don't try to understand. Understanding comes beyond trying. It comes from beyond.

-Astonishing the Gods, Ben Okri

:)

2010-07-09T22:47:00.003+05:30

Guruji says, "The nature of a human being is quite similar to that of an atom. The core of an atom is positive. The negatively charged particles are only on the periphery of the atom. Similarly, the negativity of a person is not their true nature; it is just on the periphery. We tend to act on our negative impulses because they go away if not acted upon. We procrastinate doing what's good because we know deep inside that it'll stay. It's our very nature."

2010-07-02T22:02:00.004+05:30

He that dies pays all his debts.
- William Shakespeare

Ever heard of Karma, Mr. Shakespeare?

Kuch zaroori baatain

2010-07-02T02:40:00.003+05:30

Never become so stubborn about anything in life that you cannot bear an opinion contradictory to yours.

"In the freeway of this life, take time out for ice cream vans,
In this life full of strife, allow for fun and sun tans."

All thoughts, opinions, prejudices fade away if you look from the eyes of a child. That vitality, that enthusiasm with which a child points on seeing something new or something old he likes or even dislikes, both the same, preserve it.

Never grow too old to point at a pretty butterfly or a cloud that looks like cotton candy. As it is, we've grown old enough to stop waving at airplanes and helicopters.

When was the last time you did Helicopter Bye Bye? :)

2010-06-30T00:51:00.004+05:30

Panchi, nadiya, pavan ke jhonke

koi sarhad na inhain roke...

Sarhadain insaanon ke liye hain..

Socho, tumne aur maine,

kya paaya insaan ho ke...

Lessons,Realizations from the dentist's chair

2010-06-11T01:01:00.000+05:30

1. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
2. It is okay to close your eyes when truth is staring in your face and you don't want to see it.
3. If it hurts badly, let go.
4. Even when you don't/ can't say a thing, there will be people who will understand you :)

Notes from Underground

2010-06-09T23:42:00.002+05:30

Good God, what do I care about the laws of nature and arithmetic if, for one reason or another, I don’t like these laws, including the two times two is four? Of course I cannot break through this wall with my head if I don’t have the strength to break through it, but neither will I accept it simply because I face a stone wall and am not strong enough.
As though such a stone wall were indeed a soothing element and really contained within itself even the slightest reason for making peace with it, solely because it means that two times two is four. Oh, absurdity of absurdities! But how preferable it is to understand everything, to be aware of everything, of all impossibilities and stone walls, and yet refuse to reconcile yourself to a single one of those impossibilities and walls if it sickens you to submit to them; how preferable to reach, by the most irrefutable logical combinations, the most revolting conclusions on the eternal subject that you are somehow to blame even for the stone wall, although, again, it is entirely obvious that you are not to blame at all; and in consequence of all that, to sink into voluptuous inertia, silently gritting your teeth and wallowing in the idea that, as it turns out, you don’t even have anyone to rail at; that you can’t find any object of blame and may never find one; that all this is some sort of sleight of hand, a sharper’s trick, a swindle, a plain mess in which it is impossible to tell who’s who or what’s what.

P.S.- I like Fyodor Dostoevsky

2010-06-09T00:18:00.002+05:30

mujhe kuch likhna tha... main bhool gayi...

2010-06-06T21:11:00.003+05:30

Two voices call to you from where they stood

Lay down your law books
Now they're no damn good...

:)

2010-06-02T13:15:00.003+05:30

Search for:

nothing

I'm Feeling Lucky!

2010-05-24T11:00:00.004+05:30

It is just irrational, how much we can lose to rationality.

2010-05-14T15:31:00.000+05:30

Anything that is worth doing is worth doing badly....

pagal dost...contd

2010-05-11T16:17:00.003+05:30

"Main batata hun..meri baat sun...chup chaap sunna...ek hi baar bolunga...samajh jana...baar baar nai samjha sakta...this is going to be the biggest decision of your life...tu ab koi galti nai kar sakti...just do as i say...get it?

me: haan.....bol...

"Toss karle"

me: :-/

Days

2010-05-11T14:30:00.004+05:30

If we could jump to Tuesday there’d be no Monday
If we could hop Saturday, we’d land on Sunday
Take a li’l stopover on Wednesday,
Skip Thursday
Yay! We’d make it to Friday
Any where we wished we could fly
If all the days followed our ways

:)

Life in a Metro

2010-04-29T02:23:00.000+05:30

Flyovers offer an exquisite view of the sky. The alluring sunset keeps me from getting bored during my half hour journey in the metro. Initially I used to listen to my favorite songs while travelling. Eventually I got bored of 'em. On days when I would be lucky enough to get a seat I would start reading a newspaper or a magazine with curious eyes pouring over the pages. And then I found a habit which hasn’t tired me as yet. My fellow travelers keep changing, interestingly, much like the people we meet in life- not always the same as those we started out with. I look at them as they hang on to anything they can, just as they do in life, clinging on to that little thing called hope. Hope, that someday, somehow, something if not everything, will be as they want it to be. Hope, probably the only thing that keeps them going despite the ludicrous situations life throws at them. Their driving force. Hope is it? Or is it fear? Fear, of losing what they have and also what they don’t.
They are not allowed to sit on the floor in the metro yet they do. They are not allowed to play music in the metro yet they do. They are not allowed to litter the metro yet they do. They are not allowed to eat or drink in the metro yet they do. They are free to talk in the metro but they don’t. They stand with dull expressions as if it is some solemn affair in which they have been requested to maintain silence. But they’re always in a rush-rush to get to office, rush to get out of it, rush to reach home, rush to get out of it. The only place they’re relaxed in are malls, where they have the world’s time to while away. They travel for their work. The exhaustion quite evident from their faces. Can one take a look at their faces and tell what anxieties they conceal? Can one guess what is bothering them (besides not getting a seat)? Can one know what they’ve gone through in the previous year or month or week or perhaps even a day? What do eyes that don’t reveal much reveal?
Of course there are some not so sad-looking faces. Enthusiastic ones visiting the capital for the first time. They point outside the window at flyovers under construction, the games village that should’ve been ready by now, the Akshardham temple and its splendor, the stench near the Yamuna, the guilty smoking chimneys right beside it.
I look out as the setting sun paints the sky in changing hues of red, orange, purple and some unnamed shades. Some starkly different from the others, others not so different from the rest. I look at the people in the metro. Some starkly different from the others, others not so different from the rest. Each one of them trying to create their own unique identity, as they say, trying to stand out in the crowd. They vie with each other to gain attention, approval, appreciation from their bosses, colleagues, own family, other families, anyone, everyone. Constantly in search of a common illusionary phenomenon called job satisfaction, they slog day in and out to reach this mirage. But isn’t satisfaction something to be found in something more cultured, more human, something more from the heart rather than the mind? Aren’t jobs a means to earn a living, to achieve a certain standard of living, all aspire for the (supposed) best but settle (grudgingly) for what they eventually get.
I find some happy faces in the metro. A child wrapped in his mother’s arms smiles unknowingly. He touches her face with his tiny hands. She looks at him lovingly. He doesn’t try to hide or reveal his joy. It is evident. Another child walks past me looking curiously outside the windows. It shows in his eyes. He doesn’t try to hide his curiosity. A sound breaks the long silence. No, not the one on the speaker that announces the next station and do’s and don’t of the metro and lays down the punishable offences. It is the sound of a child laughing. I borrow a smile. I turn to look. The child is holding his father’s hand or is it the other way round? Children don’t have expectations. They have beliefs. Belief that they are being taken care of. This security makes them as cheerful as they are. If we knew we were being looked after too we wouldn’t worry as much as we do. They don’t think twice before believing in something. They feel what they know is right cause that is all they know. There are no options to confuse them. When we don’t know what to do is when we see options. When we know, there are no options. Unlike the mature grown-ups, their minds do not wander to specific days or months or years in the future or the past. Perhaps that is why they are happy.
I am overwhelmed by the number of persons there are in this region alone. Yes we have heard the population figures but experiencing it is a different thing all together. Walking with the crowd at the Rajiv Chowk Metro station one realizes they aren’t just numbers or strangers or the public. They are lives very much like our own. Here for a reason.
God bless this crowd that helps me take my mind off things I allow myself to be frequently, at times needlessly, be saddened by.

chal ladai karte hain :)

2010-04-20T14:23:00.002+05:30

i would slap your cheek so u would pull mine

i would look away from you so you would look at me

i would get lost so would come looking for me

i would call you names so you would call mine firmly

i would ignore you so you would stop ignoring me

i would shout at you so you would whisper in my ear

i would keep quiet so would say something, anything

i would push you away so you would hold me near...

pagal dost :)

2010-04-14T12:59:00.003+05:30

me: after today's visit, i've really started respecting doctors...tum log sacchi bhagwan k saman hote ho

Namita: voh doctors hote hain...hum dentist ban re hain...we're not like god..we're like, we're like, we're like-technicians or engineers...far from god

me: Thanks yaar

:)

....

2010-04-11T19:02:00.003+05:30

I’ll meet u in those familiar places
among familiar faces
Walk into you by chance
smile at every glance

Walk down that corridor just to cross you
Turn around on hearing your name
Wave a hi and disappear
like it were some silly game

I’ll look for you in my walks
like for something I have lost.
I’ll find you in those familiar songs
and hope you would sing 'em along.

I’ll look for you in my strength
find you in my fears.
I’ll look for you in my laughter,
find you in my tears.

I’ll look for you in the flowers I like
find you in the ones that’ve dried.

I’ll look for you in those riddles, rhythms and rhymes
If I fail to meet you there too, I’m sure to find you in my smiles.

I’ll meet you in those familiar places, where we met in happier times…

Peter Pan

2010-03-20T20:31:00.001+05:30

Every child is affected thus the first time he is treated unfairly. All he thinks he has a right to when he comes to you to be yours is fairness. After you have been unfair to him he will love you again, but will never afterwards be quite the same boy. No one ever gets over the first unfairness; no one except Peter. He often met it, but he always forgot it. I suppose that was the real difference between him and all the rest.
So when he met it now it was like the first time; and he could just stare, helpless.

2010-03-10T21:04:00.000+05:30

Life Sucks.

let's not take it personally.

it's like waiting to get an injection

2010-02-27T20:41:00.003+05:30

u're sitting there waiting to get it, fearing it'll hurt, anticipating the pain but before u know it, u've got the shot and u're ready to go...it is thinking that it'll hurt that makes you fear it. don't worry, you'll be done with it before u even know it...it can't be that bad...

2010-02-27T13:55:00.001+05:30

Mehak: I Don't understand. WHY aren't you dancing???????

2010-02-18T13:57:00.001+05:30

what doesn't kill you makes you stronger...

2010-02-14T16:50:00.001+05:30

there has to be a limit.

:)

2010-01-25T18:13:00.002+05:30

"Purpose of words is to create silence."

2009-11-20T23:31:00.001+05:30

"the best thing to do when it's raining is to let it rain"

2009-11-01T00:35:00.003+05:30

2009-10-18T23:12:00.000+05:30

how does that even matter?

Look what I got :)

2009-10-03T21:30:00.001+05:30

2009-09-29T18:52:00.002+05:30

the sad thing
about humor
is that
it's 90% truth.

...

2009-09-04T01:15:00.003+05:30

She says its cold outside and she hands me my raincoat
Shes always worried about things like that
She says its all gonna end and it might as well be my fault
And she only sleeps when its raining
And she screams and her voice is straining

She says, baby
Its 3am I must be lonely
When she says, baby
Well I cant help but be scared of it all, sometimes
Says the rains gonna wash away I believe it

She believes that life is made up of all that youre used to
And the clock on the wall has been stuck at three for days, and days
She thinks that happiness is a mat that sits on her doorway
But outside its stopped raining...

God Bless You :)

2009-08-15T01:17:00.003+05:30

for everybody who is reading this,

God Bless You :)

P.S-what more Can one say?

:)

2009-08-05T21:53:00.002+05:30

Enchanted.

By serendipity.

2009-07-29T23:04:00.001+05:30

there are decisions we make in our lives

then there are decisions life takes for us....

Good Morning

2009-06-19T04:26:00.002+05:30

Every day when u wake up, u'll have choices on how u want to spend ur day.
Choose to be cheerful.
:)

2009-06-07T23:25:00.000+05:30

Irritated Zoozoo

2009-05-30T01:37:00.000+05:30

Bangalore.

:)

2009-05-22T21:43:00.002+05:30

There are people, and then, there are people...

bubbles've got joy :)

2009-05-06T01:51:00.002+05:30

Mary, you got too late
others've got too late...
Your trouble has begun
everybody's on a run
for you...

Mary there was some place
where everybody had good taste
for bottles of wine
and everybody shines
bottles of wine
and everybody shines....

stare of silence :)

2009-05-04T23:53:00.001+05:30

90--20
60--40

and then, there are days u stop questioning.....

take a photograph, it'll be the last....

2009-05-03T02:45:00.002+05:30

Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
All the world is waiting for the sun...

-Rain, Breaking Benjamin

happens...

2009-04-30T23:27:00.003+05:30

Sip it in
that one last drop of anger
i promise
it's the last
for the one which is left
is that of frustration.
Drink it with grace
smile as you feel it
burn your insides
keep your eyes open
to the world
that looks at you
and smirks
as you wince in pain.
it'll all be gone,
with this one drop
we'll toast to your misery
when the world
cheers at your failure

There are days that make you question everything and everyone without exception,
days that make you question the right decisions you took in your past, the wrong ones you're taking in the present.

lolz...

2009-04-25T21:02:00.003+05:30

me:cud u please send Marys actual lyrics asap?
Machliboy:i don't have em..but will do dat in a while...till then, bubbles've got joy ;)

me: kya tod diya tune cheekh maar k
Eshita: hahahah
how do u knw its me?
himanshu ka helmet!!!
lol
me: obviously
acha uske haath se gir gaya?
Eshita: hahahaha
haan
he says ki maine itni zor se bola ki uska helmet gir gaya n dis happened twice!!!
hahahah
me: wonderful

Mukul: hum thapar ni gaye
:(
me: but u won bulls n bears
kitna maangte rehte ho life se
Mukul: lolz nyc way to put it
btw if u loved dancing why did u leave it?
me:hahahahahahah
Mukul:kya hua?
me:the question
Mukul:if u loved dancing y did u leave it???
me:lolz wen do we get to keep things we love?
deciding to keep/leave something depends on a number of factors,
of which love eventually becomes the most insignificant one...
Mukul:yaar maine toh simple sa sawal poocha tha :/
me:lolz

if we were in school abhi...

2009-04-25T20:55:00.001+05:30

me:if we were in school abhi
this would've been the most exciting time of the year
new class, maybe a new floor, a new door with the class written in romans(most of the times the wrong number)a new section, a new roll no(12/13), new classmates, new books(which your mum would ask u to read a bit before school began), covering the books, the brown paper, the name stickers, the rounds at Fancy Book Store, the books that would never be available, the story books, pencil boxes, pouches, lead pencils which mom wouldn't let u buy everytime u visited the store, the spiderman hard(or is it card, will never find out)board which she would buy as a surprise :) coaxing the new class teacher to let us sit randomly and not roll number wise or squad wise, the initial enthusiasm about badges (Namrata), the rules about the bulletin boards, the charts and more importantly the pins :p, reaching early to write the thought of the day on the board, the walk from the 'primary hall' to the office, and beyond that, the tree on the left side of the building, staring at it during the classes

mehak: sigh d shuffling,d same class teacher yet another yr,same rules abt lentgh of skirts n nails same loveey mam askin abt taskeen same moral science classes wid sister wid same virtues n vices d all time classic "draw a symbol f urself" drawing a candle or a pen or a book yet another year d "ur trip has been cancelled " ur "farewell has been cancelled"
me: it's raining!!
mehak: do u ever read what the other person is writing?
me:lolz
mehak: is dis goin on d blog btw
me: ofcourse eet ees :)
mehak: y did i bother to ask!

Sweet Tragedy

2009-04-22T00:59:00.002+05:30

They knowest not what they hath
like the ruffled surface of an ocean so deep,
it remains ignorant of its sacred depths,
oblivious of its treasure chests

Blinded by a speck of dust from a breeze
And they are numb to feel it's comfort

A second passed with the length of an age
and they flapped their wings to divergant skies
Look down on the path they hath stralled, they might,
but none too humble for a landing...

in passing

2009-04-21T21:54:00.003+05:30

me: u have a lab abhi?
Machliboy: No, i just like coming to this place....there's something about the conical flasks.....the beakers....the burettes....

Y Carmel is better than Sacred Heart
me: Carmel has a locational advantage as it is at a greater distance from St.Johns.

Kaura makes a Kauri statement
me: I hate you. Period. I'm not talking to you. Second Period.
Kaura: third period.break.fourth period. fifth period.sixth period.Chuuutiiiii
me: we used to have eight.
Kaura: Due to locational advantage?

Mehak: u know.. talking to you has become dangerous...u don't know what u might put up on the blog :p

speechless

2009-04-18T13:11:00.004+05:30

me: there was a dead, decaying lizard covered in blood in my room. and there was blood on the walls n on the floor. It was Scary.Pathetic.Disgusting.Sick

Mukul Kaura: maybe someone tried to slit her wrist....

Hah

2009-04-16T01:28:00.001+05:30

Trinity:But no one's ever done that.
Neo: That's why it's going to work.

u knew this was comin' Pete

2009-04-16T00:47:00.003+05:30

"We always have a choice."

-Friendly neighborhood
Spiderman

("sarcasm everywhere")

2009-04-14T22:19:00.003+05:30

Jai Guru Dev!

Art of Loving would be starting a new course designed to make people move on. Mukul Bhaiya has agreed to take the first batch. It's a 3 hour course, fees Rs5700/- only.Hurry. Limited Seats. Forward to all.

2009-04-13T20:32:00.003+05:30

WILL

PASS

pre- debate

2009-04-12T02:23:00.004+05:30

me:sleep
vaybhuv: i am now going to try and write
me: nyt
vaybhuv: or sleep
as u put it
me: yes
i dont knw
wat am i going to do
vaybhuv: dont kill urself
me: hahahahaha
vaybhuv: slit ur writs or anything
itll be a sad way to go
me: lol
------------------------------------------
Mukul: hi
me: :)
yay kaure
online aa
status msg status msg khelenge
y sad
y dukhi yaar
Mukul: only u hv d tm to be sad?
-------------------------------------------
Mukul: yar tu na
bahut hi pinching type likhti hai
me: haha
Mukul: it pinches abhi ni pinch karega baad mein karta hai 5-10 mint baad
me: hahaha
Mukul: yaar isne kya likh diya parting curse to aur b klia tha
wo short and potent tha na
me: kya tha?
Mukul: chota tha
"chote chote teer"
bahut saare chote chote teer ikathe ho jate hai na fir to pinch
me: hahaha

GOOD FRIDAY

2009-04-11T02:45:00.003+05:30

ha ha

GOOD FRIDAY

2009-04-11T02:45:00.001+05:30

ha ha

2009-04-11T02:04:00.001+05:30

GOOD FRIDAY

Kauras Compilation

2009-03-31T22:40:00.008+05:30

divya:dekh nike nai hai,puma nai hai, adidas toh BILKUL bhi nai hai
eshita:LOTUS
winki:LOTUS BAWA

Mehak:Rourkee chalna hai?
Divya:Lolz
Mehak:Thapar chalna hai?
Divya:Lolz
Mukul:How was ur exam?
Divya:Lolz
Mehak:bandi, tujhe koi propose maare ga na tu bolegi lolz, the weather is good na...
Divya:Lolz

Line of the day
Machliboy:(with referance to Divya) yeh toh ghumti hain!!! Go girl! Go round round n have fun :p

Line of the night
Esh:Samajhta nai hai baat ko, aa jata hai raat ko

3D
(Drunk Divya's Discourse)
(mixed fruit juice from cafe i.e)

There's a tough competition between The Parting Curse and The Jealous Theory, both of which cannot be put up here.

Dev D
kaura:there should be double w in screwala

Divya Singh to Mukul, mehak, Eshita show details Apr 3 (5 days ago)

main gmail ko sakshat maan kar yeh pran leti hun:
Never Again
and i hope u all will follow my example too
Yours(for Esh) truly
Divyajot
[xDR] Dev D - 07 - Mahi Mennu.mp34828K Play Download

Write me a poem...

2009-03-30T23:02:00.003+05:30

Write me a poem,
with all colors of the wind,
maybe a song,
which in every mood i can sing.

Paint me a sky,
no,not the typical blue
but the one in which
I know how to fly.

Make me a boat,
not to cross the stream
but the one in which
I can just sit and dote.

Show me a face,
a real one that gleams,
that not in any respect
lacks some grace.

Find me a man,
living in childish oblivion,
to search for happiness whose
has never been the plan.

2009-03-28T22:40:00.001+05:30

this is to say, that i am
irritated.

The Window

2009-03-28T12:51:00.001+05:30

It was too dark for even the dark clouds to show themselves.
She stared at the rain from her thick glass window, which now looked thicker due to the streaks of water that ran down its surface. At times a car would pass by. She would listen to the sound of the water in the puddles making way for the speeding car. She loved to do that herself too. But today was not the day. Instead of running out to stand still in the rain, she sat quietly on a tiled, slippery window pane. She hugged her knees as she sat there in her white,floral summer dress that reached just below her knees(yes, the one her mother wouldn't let her buy). A cat was purring in the distance. It was a windy night. It seemed that the wind had carried the cat's cry farther than it would've gone otherwise. She did not like cats. It did not matter.
The rain battered hard on the glass window, forming short-lived patterns which she kept studying. Each pattern got lost somewhere as it gave way to a new one. The street lamp flickered. Engrossed in watching the patterns, she had forgotten to take notice of her own reflection in the glass. The flickering light brought her attention to that. For the first time she noticed it-the pattern of the tears that rolled down her pale cheek.There was nothing special about it. And then she continued looking outside.
Outside the window that is.

......

2009-03-27T23:43:00.002+05:30

who stole the cookie from the coo-key-jaa(r)?
who me?
yes you.
couldn't be
then who?

quick quick
be quick
quick quick
kaunsa quick?

WTF

2009-03-23T00:42:00.003+05:30

i feel like writing today, not here, maybe on paper, so i could crumple and throw it later on or maybe in a register, so i could rip it apart....

Hey there Delilah

2009-03-19T20:49:00.000+05:30

I want to fly to Boston.
I want to drive to Ambala.
I want to sail to Australia.

Escapades

2009-03-16T01:00:00.004+05:30

so im sitting,thinking of sending mehak a msg
the next moment, the phone rings, it's her
i say-badi lambi umar hai yaar teri
she says-nahinn yaar, lambi umar nai chahiye...sigh
:D
----------------------------------------------------
mehak: roorkee chalein?
me: lol
mehak: kuchh jawab degi?
me: kab?
kab hai?
mehak: 20-22
march
i beleive d answer is no
sigh
me: lol
tune jana hai?
mehak: i wanna get out of ghar
lets go
me: same here
mehak: it cant b bad
we ll come back if it is
yahi umar hai yar
2nd yr abt to finish
delhi bhi nahi gaye
3rd mein we ll get busy
whatever u know lol
me: lol
:)
mehak: sigh..it really is a no
no?
:P
me: yaar
chutti ni maar sakti col se
mehak: y?
weekend hai
next excuse
say sumthin
me: hahaha
lol
mehak: nt wht i ws hopin for
mehak: lets go damn it
wtf
me: lol
mehak: i hate u
me: mehak tune p hui hai?
haha
dat makes d two of us
i hate me too
mehak: delhi ke time tune ghar shifting mein help karni thi... acceptable
par yeh toh hadd ho gayi?
toh matlab pakka wali nai rite
u def. not gonna tell me aaj
or kal
or tue
or wed
or nxt week
after d fest is over
me: lol
mehak: jawab na diyo besharam

People n their antics

2009-03-15T02:20:00.005+05:30

Kaura:suggest a topic to talk about
me: ways to kill you
Kaura:cliched hai, koi aur
me: :)
Kaura: :P
Kaura: ;)
Kaura: :(
Kaura: :O
Kaura: ::
----------------------------------------------
hellothisisanuj: fuck i fuckin told u
me: fuck u shudve been there
hellothisisanuj: i wish i cud! fuck yaar i chose the wrong time
me: watever anuj
hellothisisanuj: now just shut the fuck up and lssn
blah blah blah
me:crap ok
hellothisisanuj: bbye
gnyt
me: fuck u
:)
byebye
hellothisisanuj: :)
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Eshita: yaar pehle duniya ni jeene deti thi,ab machar bhi khoon chooste hain
me:u r funny
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Machliboy:Sup babe? ;)
me: shy shy
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
me:thas like eeew
me:_______________
hellothisisanuj:u just did an eew statement, though of a different genre
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P.S.-Mr.Kaura,do not feel free to comment here.

Golden Rules to a Happy Life :)

2009-03-13T02:19:00.003+05:30

1.Listen to Anuj Duggal.
2.Listen to your mother.
3.Keep things simple.
4.Eat.
5.Go to sleep.

untitled

2009-03-06T01:51:00.004+05:30

I’m not going to move ahead
I can’t
I don’t want to
Why should I?
I can’t
But what do I have over here which I can’t let go of, which I don’t want to leave behind, which has fixed my feet so strongly? Nothing. There’s pain, that tiny twinge for what happened. It holds me back so firmly that I cannot walk. I call out to people, tell them to take me with them, drag me if need be, but pull me out of this place in any possible manner. They do that, yes they successfully do that till on one stupid day, something stupid happens to me and I take a U-turn. I hate this U-turn. I wish there were no U-turns or reverse gears.

I reach back at the same place I had been so desperate to leave. Perhaps I have begun to find comfort in this state of perpetual sadness. Perhaps everything looks familiar here. Perhaps I do not need to make any effort when I’m here coz this is my space, my time where I can comfortably sit back and whine. Here, I can complain about anyone and anything. I can swear my heart out. Yes, it is as good as it sounds. It is my zone for eliminating anything that is capable of bringing happiness to anyone. I walk with a rotten look. I roll my eyes in the opposite direction when I see you. I walk through you without acknowledging you. I do that every day till You ask me- why? And then, I shout:

You want to know why? (And I repeat that in a higher pitch.) Do you even have the brains to understand why? Do you have the strength to kill your ego and listen to me for once? You’ve heard me before, and you will hear me now but you will listen to only one person and that is your self.

You look slightly moved. I can see the lines on your forehead curve. I don’t want to see your face. I have known you like the back of my hand. Today, I wish to slap you with it’s front. But I don’t. As always, you pretend you have not the slightest idea of what I 'happen' to be upset about. With the most innocent look one can have on his face, you ask, Now what have I done? (laying stress on the words now and I.) As always, I ask you to ask yourself. And as always, your self is clueless so it turns to me. I tell you what you have done.

And you say- that’s it? and I thought I had done something out of proportions. I can’t believe you were mad at me over such a trivial issue. At this, I wish to pick up anything closest to my hand and swoop it across your head. I don’t coz my brain cannot send that signal to the nerves of my hand. Another signal intercepts the aggressive one. This one works in a funny manner. Instead of making me argue, it renders me speechless. I say something but I can’t hear my voice. You continue your favorite hobby of justifying your self acquitted self.

As if that was not enough, you decide that it is in our benefit to never talk about the same thing again. I wonder- when did I talk? Isn’t it a two sided thing where both the persons get a chance, no, grab a chance to speak and make their point? But that is not applicable in our case or more aptly, your case. You speak, you make your point, you win. Just then someone calls you from behind. Important work or an important person, either of these compel you to leave no matter how much you want to hear me out and ‘set’ things right.

You promise to return and like all other things that you promise to do, you forget to do so with a heightened sense of pride. I look at you and for the first time pity you. pity you for deceiving yourself, pity you for absolving yourself for something you cannot be pardoned, pity you coz I’m done pitying myself. I stand back and watch you walk away to the work that calls you, the work you go about without sparing a single thought to what just passed between us.

you go ahead and do your thing.i go and write a post-a post like the look on my face, which like all other posts and looks, you will never read even if it is written.

Tempers

2009-03-02T23:06:00.002+05:30

His computer’s white screen reflected in his rectangular, golden framed reading glasses. That was the only bit of color on his otherwise dull face. Today, like every other day, he sat working, in the fixed corner of the living room (which looked anything but alive), occasionally looking up at the clock. There was a clock on his computer screen but he would look at the one fixed on the wall, ticking away aimlessly and then, out of habit, at the watch he was wearing.

In the middle of the room, in front of the dressing table, on a wooden stool, sat a little girl. She did not look at him. He did not look at her. He was busy working. She was busier making faces in front of the mirror. She moved close to it, shut one eye and began counting her eyelashes with the other. She moved back, opening her eye like a new born. He scribbled something on his writing pad. She raised her right hand and ran down her nails on the recently painted wall. The paint did not come off, nor did it leave any mark. She turned back to the mirror. Staring at her eyes she noticed how abnormally large they were for the size of her face. She crinkled her nose and concluded it was abnormally tiny for her face. She pressed her lips, like she used to watch her mother do after applying lipstick. Just then, he opened the drawer of his table, peeped into it and shut it with a loud thud. With a sudden sense of urgency, he looked behind a stack of old, forgotten files lying on his table. He was evidently searching for something (isn’t each one of us?). There was another sound, of him pushing his chair back and standing up. She did not turn to look at him. (She was busy, remember?) He left the room as if lost in deep thought.

In the other room (we will leave the details of which room it was) he found what he had been looking for. He picked up the ‘post it’ pad and removed the cap of his Parker pen. She had gifted him this pen, but he did not remember that or maybe pretended, like all other things, that he didn’t (one can always pretend, if nothing else). With his trembling hands that always trembled, he wrote in his petite, wicked handwriting: I’m leaving.

His face broke into a one sided smile as he removed the note from the notepad. As he walked back towards the living room, he tried to imagine the face she would make when he would stick the note on her mirror, for her to stare at. When he reached there, the room was vacant. His chair and table and stool were still in place like his laptop and the stack of files that had been unmoved for years. But we will say that the room was vacant as she was not there. Noticing a lipstick lying on the floor, he walked towards the dressing table. Glaring at his face, in a depressing maroon shade, on the mirror, were the words:
I’M LEAVING

the L-factor

2009-03-02T21:59:00.003+05:30

dekh, there are 3 L's that are responsible for what happened, and no, your favorite love is not one of them. They are as follows (not in order of priority):

1. Luck- it happened coz it had to happen, simple.

2. Lesson- there was a lesson to be learnt through it, a purpose which u fail to see today, but you will see it someday.

3.Loser- coz u are one

Feb 1, 2009

2009-03-01T00:42:00.001+05:30

Nangia: I do not remember when all of us watched the movie or played basketball..If i was Chetan Bhagat, i would've written my fourth book about his b'day.

me:yes, i could've added a chapter.

period.

Testing times

2009-02-28T23:14:00.004+05:30

ten minutes before the exam, while turning pages of the book:
o yaar.... aage bhi dikha de........ kya hai.........jo main chod k ja raha hun :D

Mac: I want to go to lake and jump into it
DJ( in high spirits): I finallllyy don't want to jump into it
Mac: Why? you finally found another way of killing yourself?

What happens when someone comes and tells you something you've known all along, but you wish you would rather be wrong about it than your belief be true?
YOU CAN'T SLEEP

Songs are for happy days.
Even sad songs are for happy days.
There are no songs for days like these.
If you still think there are,then well probably you know not which days am i talking about...

vaise, duniya ka koi dharam toh nahin hai na...

just for laughs

2009-02-21T13:12:00.005+05:30

all of us(girls) have at one point of time or the other, plucked petals of flowers/leaves(real or imaginary) and played the he loves me, he loves me not game, the lucky ones- he loves me,he loves me a lot game. here are some more, taking into account the circumstances in todays world :-
(with priceless contributions from Mehak)

1. for those who have been cheated/betrayed
he loves me, he loves her

2.for those who are confused
i love him, i love him not

3.for those who are really confused
i love him, i love her

Pass it on to women you think can have a good laugh at this.